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Yeah. It’s me, Doug. And it’s been me the whole time! You were stabbed! Yes! Because I stabbed me! Stabbed by me! You’d be amazed at how durable the human body is when pushed to its limit. Especially when it gets you off. Why did you do it, Doug? We’re family! Because I’m sick and tired of being a Dangler! Look at all of you! Look! With your boring innuendo, and your mood lighting, and your-and your banter, and your foreplay! You people are all soft! You’re soft to your cores! But not me. I’m hard! I’m hard core! Oh, my gosh! She’s-she’s been deep throated! I’ve been stabbed, man! There’s piss and blood everywhere! It’s a golden shower! Ah! He got fisted! He got fisted! Fisted! You’re sick, Doug! You were sick in space, and you’re even sicker now! I’m sick? No, no, no no. I’m the cure, OK? I’m the vaccine that’s going to rid us all of the-of-of– of this missionary love making. No. I’m the gagging. I’m the choking. I’m the pissing. I’m the gaping anus. I am the future! We are not those people! That’s not what we do! What are you talking about? What-what are you doing? You-you should all be railing each other! You two-you two should be tag teaming her! If anything, we’re having less sex and talking a lot more! I’m still a virgin. Cross, arrest this man! You want to dance? Let’s go. Yeah. Oh, come on. Come on. Yeah. You know you want it! Oh! Yeah! Oh! It’s all heated lube! Lube me up, baby! It’s out! It’s out! Oh, oh! I hate you! Yeah! Oh, please don’t tease me. Shut up, Uncle Doug! Hugh, he’s getting in my head! Please, stop! Stop it! Ah! Ah! Dr. Bunny Van Clit! And Detective Cross too! Ah, poor him! Listen kiddo. You don’t have to do this. You want to get laid? You can find some skank who’s down to clown in the back of my bang bus. I want my first time to be spec– Ah! Here! Mom! I don’t give a about some vibrator! Ah! God! ! Ah! Ah! Bunny! You want your first time to be special? Yeah? Let’s make some memories. A little amateur video, huh, Hugh? Yeah. If you’re not going to do it, I’ll do it for you, with you, as you! Yeah. Oh, look at this! Bunny’s trying to get out of here! Oh, bye-bye Bunny! Whoa!
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